Monday, January 31, 2022

Dreams of the Retiree

Most retired people still have dreams about work. Most working people have dreams about school. Most kids have dreams about monsters.

These are gross generalizations, certainly, which is what makes them interesting. But to deal with the retired person first, why would we expect it to be any different? After 40 or 50 years of repetitive behavior befitting a Marx Brothers’ movie, most of us have enough material to script hundreds of nightmares.

Bad bosses, double-crossing colleagues, shocking failures, absurd successes, compliments, insults, promotions, demotions, hirings, firings. The parade of inputs goes on and on. If we were writing a movie script, this would all be back-story to the current drama, which is but a dream.

The working person relives his or her high school and college years while sleeping. There were enough anxieties during those passages to populate a million dreams during your working years.

Anything to avoid dreaming about your present reality!

One friend in her 30s told me she dreamt about her boss, a slightly older woman but in her dream, her boss was her mother. There is that too, the parents who keep showing up long after you’ve left home, long even after they’ve departed this world.

Kids have to sort out an immensely confusing world where magic beings like the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus have more power than any of the more visible authority figures, plus they tend to use it (power) in much better ways.

That helps explain magic, which in turn might help ward off this monsters under the bed, in the closet or just around the next bedtime.

***

This weekend brought a return to how things used to be before the pandemic — brunches, gatherings to watch sports games, spring-like weather. After taking the train into the city on Sunday, I met my three youngest for brunch at a place in the Mission District we’ve been visiting since it opened way back in 2004.

They were little kids then (ten, eight and six) but now they are all in their twenties, starting in on their careers and navigating life in the Covid era like everyone else. One difference from the past is the restaurant has outdoor booths now like many places in San Francisco.

So much in our lives has changed over the past two years that each time I can revisit life as I used to know it in the city brings an almost overwhelming sense of nostalgia. There are the stairs we always climbed inside the parking structure, that’s the yellow pad & clipboard where they write the names of those waiting for a table, there’s that same old menu, familiar and comforting.

These were the details I took for granted for years, not knowing what was to come. Frankly, I’m shocked the establishment was able to weather the pandemic and stay in business; I gather it came close to closing like so many others did.

It’s little moments like Sunday’s that I savor most now. Maybe Covid has more surprises in store for us, but we’ve made it through surge after surge and we’re still here.

And I’m grateful for that.

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