“We really did have everything, didn’t we?” — Dr. Randall Mindy (Don’t Look Up)
Increasingly, in conversations with friends and associates, as well as from reports by social scientists, I am coming to believe that the Covid pandemic has had a hidden but devastating impact on our collective mental health.
Whether we consider ourselves introverts or extroverts, humans are inherently social creatures. We may not want to admit it, but we need regular contact with each other. Without it, our hopes shrivel and our dreams die.
But during the pandemic we became accustomed to being alone, isolated and living our lives by remote control.
With this in mind, today I’m republishing an edited version of an essay I wrote on this topic a year ago, when we were first emerging from the worst of the pandemic. It feels as accurate today to me as it did then.
***
According to Dutch sociologist Gerald Mollenhorst (2009), prior to the pandemic we were replacing half of our social network every seven years. Of course that was back in the times when there were many mores social opportunities.
So I wonder how that figure has fared over the past two years. Though many made efforts to reconnect with old friends through group zoom calls and other virtual tools including social media, Covid-19 created a vast social desert. It seems obvious that new relationships were hard to come by for most of us .
Meanwhile, one of the main points in an article in the Atlantic called, “It’s Your Friends Who Break Your Heart,” is that we need our friends now more than ever.
Friend love is often overlooked in our literature and films, but the love provided by friends plays at least as big a role as family in most people’s lives.
Furthermore, a large and growing number of Americans are single and living alone — for them friends may constitute their entire family.
I said I wouldn’t watch “Don’t Look Up” twice but I did anyways — the film with Jennifer Lawrence and Leonard DiCaprio about the impending end of the world.
The concluding scene where the main characters gather with a handful of friends for dinner as the killer asteroid closes in on earth is emblematic of everything I’ve said above about friendships, both new and old.
How would you choose to spend your final moments under such circumstances? Anyone who answers “alone” is lying.
The Solution? Connect. Keep making friends. Renew friendships that have atrophied. Rebuild your social network. Make new friends. Maybe it’s easy for you, maybe it’s hard, but keep at it. In the final analysis, that may be the only way that we as a species will avoid that catastrophic last scene anyway.
LINKS:
It’s Your Friends Who Break Your Heart — The older we get, the more we need our friends—and the harder it is to keep them (Atlantic)
FDA moves to ease restrictions on blood donations for men who have sex with men (NPR)
‘I have no enemies, at least’: Where Santos really stands in the House GOP (Politico)
Yes, everyone has classified documents. The system is out of control. (Fareed Zakaria/WP)
Trump secretly donated $1m to discredited Arizona election ‘audit’ (Guardian)
National Archives Asks Ex-Presidents and Vice Presidents to Scour Their Files (NYT)
Tyre Nichols video: Memphis authorities release footage from deadly traffic stop (Fox)
What we know – and still don’t know – about what led to Tyre Nichols’ death (CNN)
Suspect in Northern California farm shootings reportedly confesses, claims he was not in his right mind (NBC)
Half Moon Bay suspect admits to shooting rampage, says he was bullied (WP)
he FBI revealed it had secretly hacked and disrupted a prolific ransomware gang called Hive, a maneuver that allowed the bureau to thwart the group from collecting more than $130 million in ransomware demands from more than 300 victims. (Reuters)
'Everybody is cheating': Why this teacher has adopted an open ChatGPT policy (NPR)
ChatGPT passes exams from law and business schools (CNN)
Big Tech was moving cautiously on AI. Then came ChatGPT. (WP)
A robot was scheduled to argue in court, then came the jail threats (NPR)
Big Tech Is Really Bad at Firing People (Wired)
Twitter has been sued in Germany by an anti-hate-speech organization and Jewish students to force Elon Musk’s company to block or remove antisemitic posts. Six examples of antisemitic comments reportedly detailed in the suit were all posted in the last three months, since Musk took over the platform. Laws against Holocaust denial and other speech hailing Nazis and supporting antisemitism are particularly strict in Germany. [HuffPost]
Three men indicted in plot to kill Iranian-American journalist on U.S. soil (Politico)
Bilal al-Sudani: US forces kill Islamic State Somalia leader in cave complex (BBC)
Will U.K. Rejection of Scottish Gender Bill Bolster Independence Movement? (NYT)
New barrage of Russian strikes in Ukraine kills at least 11 (AP)
Russia has stepped up attempts to break through Ukraine's defenses with heavy fighting in the east of the country, underlining Kyiv's need of more Western weapons, Ukrainian officials said. (Reuters)
Russia admits Putin pardoning convicts so they can join Wagner in Ukraine (Financial Times)
Ukraine faces logistics hurdles ahead of tank deliveries (WP)
Ukraine Corruption Scandal Stokes Longstanding Aid Concerns in U.S. (NYT)
As fentanyl boomed, DEA removed Mexico director amid misconduct probe (WP)
World champion says Rubik’s Cube and violin go hand in hand (AP)
A new study identified ways to slow memory decline and lower dementia risk.
Eating a balanced diet, exercising the mind and body regularly, having regular contact with others, and not drinking or smoking. The findings, published this week, add to other research that suggests a healthy lifestyle may help our brains age better. (WP)
Pence Says He Hid Behind Classified Documents to Keep Women from Lusting After Him (New Yorker)
U.S. Officials Announce Plans To Continue Pretending Brutal State-Sponsored Violence Not Supposed To Happen (The Onion)