Monday, November 20, 2006

Most of the time*

What a sad lament. Tonight I feel like singing the Blues. No, not just tonight, many nights. I’ve been told my best quality is my sense of hope. A number of my friends and colleagues appreciate how much I’ve stayed positive about the overall experience of being alive.

At the same time, I get many worried expressions of concern when I’m depressed. Maybe we’ve made an error in our culture pathologizing a state (depression) that seems to me to just be a natural reaction to the reality around us.

It’s simply not true that the only component of depression is our personal sense of alienation, as we deal with the body blows dealt in our personal lives. There is another piece – and that is our collective depression at what our world has become.

If I hadn’t read as much history as I have, I wouldn’t be able to contextualize what I’m about to say. But I have read a lot of history – of Europe, Asia, Africa, South America and North America. (One of these posts, I’ll list my top 25 favorite history books.) I’m well aware of the chaos of our past. But it’s impossible to live in the past; my own time on earth has been characterized by amazing, almost miraculous improvements in the standards of living for people all over the world.

It has also seen the rise of technological solutions to problems that not long ago would have seemed insoluable.

Nevertheless, we face even greater problems on the horizon. A flu pandemic. Mutated disease vectors against which we have no defense. Germs resistant to all our medicines.

Global warming. Rising oceans. Earthquakes, hurricanes, tsunamis.

Meteors, cosmic collisions. (Recall that show at the planetarium in New York?)

Human warfare. Idiotic, primitive warfare. What our country is doing to Iraq. What Israel is doing to Palestine. The genocide in Darfur.

This list could be expanded, but I don’t have time now. Okay, so we all know about all of these things, yet our state of emotional well-being often comes down to the particulars of our personal lives.

Losses hurt. Deaths of friends shock. Job losses shock. Financial setbacks shock. But breakups tear our hearts into little pieces. Tonight I mourn every sad heart yearning for an earlier time, a moment when we just held each other softly, kissed, and shared our warmth with each other.

If you have somebody treasure him or her!

Submitted by “all alone in San Francisco.”

-30-

*By Bob Dylan

Most of the time
I'm clear focused all around,
Most of the time
I can keep both feet on the ground,
I can follow the path, I can read the signs,
Stay right with it, when the road unwinds,
I can handle whatever I stumble upon,
I don't even notice she's gone,
Most of the time.

Most of the time
It's well understood,
Most of the time
I wouldn't change it if I could,
I can't make it all match up, I can hold my own,
I can deal with the situation right down to the bone,
I can survive, I can endure
And I don't even think about her
Most of the time.

Most of the time
My head is on straight,
Most of the time
I'm strong enough not to hate.
I don't build up illusion 'till it makes me sick,
I ain't afraid of confusion no matter how thick
I can smile in the face of mankind.
Don't even remember what her lips felt like on mine
Most of the time.

Most of the time
She ain't even in my mind,
I wouldn't know her if I saw her
She's that far behind.
Most of the time
I can't even be sure
If she was ever with me
Or if I was with her.

Most of the time
I'm halfway content,
Most of the time
I know exactly where I went,
I don't cheat on myself, I don't run and hide,
Hide from the feelings, that are buried inside,
I don't compromised and I don't pretend,
I don't even care if I ever see her again
Most of the time.


-30-

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