Progress as a Dad (I hope)

Tonight, my 14-year-old daughter called me "Daddy" during our nightly phone call check-in. That has not happened in a long while.

So that is the headline of my day. For many months now, I have not had a name, only more of a shrug, an eye-roll, and an inaudible grunt. Her brothers, witnessing this and sensing how it has affected me, have been criticizing her for a while now.

Though I am grateful to them for being sensitive to the subtleties of how we communicate with each other as a family, I've also told them to lay off, because she is going through what all 14-year-old girls go through.

Of course, as her Dad, I understand. Plus she is not the first but the third of my daughters, so I get it on many other levels. My goal at this point is just to make sure we stay connected while she migrates her way through the almost unimaginable painfully experience of being a teenaged girl.

Here is what I try to do.

I ask her what it is really like to be a young girl riding public transportation. "Does anyone bother you? Do you ever feel threatened? Are there any weirdos who try to approach you?"

Then I suggest to her what to do if anything like hat happens. She is shy but also strong. She also has self-defense training, which is a good thing.

Then I ask her about school.

Who are the kids she is meeting and how does she feel about them? Who might become a friend? This is the difficult social aspect of being a freshwoman in high school.

Any suggestions are welcome. I could use help. Few people respond to these posts any longer, since I took this blog private.

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