(NOTE: I first published a version of this on Valentine’s Day 12 years ago.)
Somebody said something to me today. It was "Happy Valentine's Day." The guy who said it is a contractor, a carpenter by trade, a nice man who rents a garage nearby. It startled me for a moment, because I had doubted anyone would remember to say that to me today.
In fact, a number of people did, and I said it back to them. It felt good.
The guy who said it first is the one who broke through my defense system. When “special” days like this one come around, my mood tends to to nosedive. In order to avoid reminders what I did in happier years, I try to build an emotional cocoon around myself.
My neighbor said something else, as we both scurried inside from the rain to our separate venues, about how today should really be about "love in all of its various forms."
That hit me. Love in all of its various forms. Why is the most elusive kind — romantic love — the only one that seems to matter?
When you go out of your way to help someone in need, what do you call that?
When you sense that a person is lonely and you call them, what is that?
When you are on the street and you pass someone who seems to be in pain, and you offer your friendliest smile, what is that?
When someone you know has lost a loved one and you try to comfort them, what is that?
When you have bit more of something than you need, and you give it to someone who has a bit less than they need, what is that?
When you see a stranger having trouble crossing the street and you take his or her hand and guide them to safety, what is that?
When on a bus, safely in your seat, a person gets on who clearly should not be trying to stand up in such a place and you stand up to give it to them, what is that?
When a child approaches you, and you sense that child's vulnerability, even if you have no idea what precisely the issue is, and you comfort that child, what is that?
When the person you think you love above all others has to go, has to leave you, has to pursue her own dreams apart from you, and you set her free, what is that?
When a person who has broken your heart finds new love and you somehow find the strength to wish them well, what is that?
When a person whose dreams have been shattered needs a shoulder to cry on, and you provide it, what is that?
When you try to comfort a complete stranger, what is that?
When someone is firing you from your job, and you know this will provoke a serious crisis in your life, but you nevertheless help them not to feel so bad in the moment, what is that? (Okay that might be something else.)
When you find something someone has lost, and you think it might matter to them so you make sure they get it back, what is that?
When you are at the bedside of a dying person and they are having trouble letting go and you find yourself saying, "It's okay. You can go now. We understand," what is that?
When, despite the evidence, you believe there still will be a happy ending to our common story, what is that?
You tell me.
LINKS:
China accuses U.S. of flying spy balloons into Chinese airspace more than 10 times (NPR)
US jets down 4 objects in 8 days, unprecedented in peacetime (AP)
Ownership of objects shot down over Alaska and Canada unknown, White House says (WP)
On flying objects, U.S. general not ruling out aliens (Reuters)
White House on unidentified objects: ‘No indication of aliens’ (Politico)
All 3 objects flying over US and Canada believed to be balloons, Schumer says: Congress must learn more (ABC)
The strange objects in US airspace may be an even bigger problem than we thought (CNN)
US defends decision to shoot down three unidentified objects (AP)
Debris of downed objects may never be recovered, official warns, as White House tries to tamp down on conspiracies (CNN)
What’s Going On Up There? Theories but No Answers in Shootdowns of Mystery Craft. (NYT)
Top general says suspected Chinese spy balloons have flown over Middle East (Politico)
Michigan State police confirm 3 dead, at least 5 wounded in mass shooting (Lansing State Journal)
United States tells citizens: Leave Russia immediately (Reuters)
US and European stocks rise as investors look to inflation data (Financial Times)
Republicans say they would not cut Social Security and Medicare programs but "everything else is on the table" in talks over raising government borrowing limits, House Oversight Committee Chair James Comer said. (Reuters)
Nikki Haley Is Running for President, the First G.O.P. Rival to Take On Trump (NYT)
Why Are Layoffs Contagious? (Atlantic)
Eric Schmidt Is Building the Perfect AI War-Fighting Machine (Wired)
ChatGPT-assisted diagnosis: Is the future suddenly here? (STAT)
What Poets Know That ChatGPT Doesn’t (Atlantic)
“It’s Not Possible for Me to Feel or Be Creepy”: An Interview with ChatGPT (New Yorker)
AI and the Collapse of Societal Trust (Newsweek)
Bernie Sanders Has a New Role. It Could Be His Final Act in Washington. (NYT)
Parts of Georgia grand jury report on Trump and 2020 election aftermath to be made public (CNN)
After Earthquakes, Turkey Makes More Arrests Connected to Collapsed Buildings (WSJ)
Russian exodus stands to redefine the country for generations (WP)
Russia said its troops had pushed forward a few kilometers along the frontlines in Ukraine, while Kyiv said its forces had repelled Russian attacks in several areas. (Reuters)
Teen girls ‘engulfed’ in violence and trauma, CDC finds (WP)
Replacing Just 7 Minutes of Sedentary Behavior Every Day Could Boost Mid-Life Brain Power (SciTechDaily)
The IRS cleared up confusion over how to tax state stimulus payments. It will not collect taxes against most state-issued inflation relief or tax refunds, meaning millions of people in more than 20 states can go ahead with their returns. (WP)
Report: 84% Of Super Bowl Ads Specifically Intended To Distract From Human Rights Violation (The Onion)
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