Happy 6th Birthday Luca!

Dear Cats: A Better Day is Coming

Trying to make two old cats comfortable is proving challenging but I'm doing my best. Every night around 2 a.m., one or both of them start crying, there's no other word for it, so I lumber out of bed and try to comfort them.

But I cannot offer what they want -- their home, the kids, their comfort zone.

I think both cats recognize me and know I am getting them their food and water, but neither really wants to be here.

In trying to care for them, I am struck by how hard it is for any animal, including humans, to age and accept the insecurities and indignities of age.

In my own case, I have gotten very frightened at times when I think my landlady might kick me out. Around here, she could easily charge a new tenant twice as much as I pay in rent, given the housing shortage that plagues San Francisco. If she evicted me, I would have no place to go that I could afford within comfortable access to my job or my teenagers.

Should that occur, I would probably wake up at 2 a.m. each night also and cry out for help. I think that is what happens in most nursing homes, frankly, which breaks my heart. A sad statement on the human condition and our society as a whole.

But for now, I tell the cats, "Hold on." This is also one of the key lines from one my favorite music videos, as long-time readers will know: "Everybody Hurts," by R.E.M.(BTW, this official video is all I can embed, and it is not anywhere near as raw and real as I used to be able to embed. That is one reason personal blogging is no longer a viable option for capturing true feelings. YouTube is making its profits, thank you.)

Alone With the Cats

Late last night, I drove my teens and their Mom to the airport for their vacation trip east, visiting their surviving grandparents. They are back there for 12 days, while I stay here and take care of their cats, Ghoasty and Pumpkin. This is the first time I have done this since soon after I moved into this apartment back in the summer of 2003.

Time never stops, of course.

But there are so many differences between then and now. Then they were young children, dealing with a sudden and painful divorce. Then, these cats were kittens. Then, I had a new girlfriend who wanted to "take care of me." Ghoasty ran away and we feared she was lost. After, I don't know, ten days, she came back, skinny and hurt, but alive.

Dylan and Julia brought both cats over mid-day Sunday and stayed here until we left for SFO last night. They tried to get them to be comfortable in this new environment. It was tough, lots of protests, squeals, and sleepness nights for the three of us. Now it is my job to make sure my kids can happily return to their main home on Saturday the 26th with their pets alive and healthy.

But I admit this is stressful -- I do not know much about how to take care of (non-human) animals. Thus last year's horrible disaster with Biggie.

But I am determined to do better. So I have been carefully following Julia's instructions about how to care for these cats. They are old cats, sort of like me. They clearly like to eat.

That is all I have figured out so far. Please root for me to be successful. But I do wish I has a partner here to help with this.
:(

Go Giants

Wednesday night Dylan, Aidan and his girlfriend Zaira, and I saw the Giants beat the A's, 5-2. This was easily the highlight of my week.

All three kids will soon be off to college at the University of Montana. Will I miss them? Like a flower misses the sun (and also the rain).

-30-

Happy Birthday America

I am not considered the stereotypical patriotic type, nor are any of my children, so far as I can tell, but in our own ways we are loyal Americans, holding the country to its first principles and ideals, especially Freedom of Speech.

The Fourth of July has never been for me a reason to celebrate my country, but it is a day off work. I cooked breakfast for two of my kids (a third being with friends up at Lake Tahoe) and then they went off for the day. I've settled in for a day of watching sports -- World Cup soccer matches and baseball games -- and some random writing.

It's a breezy, foggy day here in San Francisco. I do not know that folks will be able to see the fireworks very well tonight. But that is often a challenge here.

As a kid, I was almost always at our beloved Rolling Hills on this holiday weekend -- one of the big three each summer. Those were, in retrospect, the best Independence Days I ever had.

-30-

Newsroom Gathering

Today at KQED a lot of us stopped doing our jobs at our desks, grabbed laptops, and gathered at the news table before some big-screen TV sets. We all watched, cheered and groaned together as the US soccer team fell just short of advancing in the World Cup, 1-2.

As I sat there with my colleagues, I thought about the many years I've spent on the sidelines, cheering my own children as they've played the "beautiful game." Like all things beautiful, it is also exquisitely painful.

Today was a day of pain.

-30-

Week of Sports

Tuesday night we were off to our first Giants game together this season. My youngest son, daughter and her friend and me.

Our team lost but we had a good time.

On Thursday morning I stayed home from work to watch the World Cup with all three of my (sleepy) teens. The US lost but advanced, in the funny way of soccer tournaments, as we ate bacon.