Desperately seeking something -- anything -- funny, I binged on old SNL episodes. That worked, sort of. Then I watched a baseball game with my grandson -- that worked better. His team won the game, making him happy.
My team lost, making me sad.
In the process, I taught him the basics of fantasy baseball, which is as much about math as the actual sport. This seemed to energize him as he repeatedly checked various players' statistics and drew conclusions thereupon.
The overall problem here in the newly tropical Bay Area is, of course, that the ponderous news cycle will never help matters. And this global warming has become really oppressive. There is just no relief in sight.
It's Desperation Row around here. That has a certain ring to it.
Coming to us this sweaty overnight are the following tidbits:
* ‘We’re Clearly Not Doing Enough’: Drop in Testing Hampers Coronavirus Response -- For the first time during the pandemic, the United States saw a downward trend in the number of coronavirus tests conducted each day. (New York Times)
* Cedar Rapids and nearby Iowa communities, still in shambles days after destructive derecho, plead for help -- Dispatches from Cedar Rapids reveal a disaster zone, with damage to most homes and businesses, some severe, trees down everywhere, roads blocked and hospitals overrun. (Washington Post)
* The election is a choice between Donald Trump — and Kamala Harris (Washington Post)
* Bald Eagle Sends Government Drone Into Lake Michigan -- In a rare case of nature taking on a manmade machine and winning, a bald eagle attacked and destroyed a government drone that was flying above Lake Michigan on an environmental monitoring mission. The Phantom 4 Pro Advanced quodcopter drone was about 162ft in the sky when it is thought the bird of prey attacked – possibly mistaking the flying machine for a rival bird or tasty snack. The drone had one of its propellors torn off and spiraled from the skies, sinking to the bottom of the lake. (The Guardian)
* Leaders at the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention were blindsided this week when President Donald Trump announced that the agency could deploy teams to assist schools with safely reopening in the fall, a senior CDC official told CNN. "My administration also stands ready to deploy CDC teams to support schools that are opening and schools that need help in safety and in order to safely reopen," Trump said on Tuesday during a briefing.The announcement left CDC officials scrambling this week to train-up staff to be able to deploy if they are called upon, the senior official said. (CNN)
* Two senior Trump political appointees departed the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, a senior official at the agency confirmed to CNN. Kyle McGowan, the chief of staff, and Amanda Campbell, the deputy chief of staff, resigned effective Friday, leaving to start a consulting firm, the official said. Both left voluntarily, the official added. (CNN)
* The media was far less likely to let birtherism attacks slide this time -- When Trump launched in birtherism attacks, the media was more prepared this time. (Washington Post)
* In Big Ten cities, a fall without college football is a crushing economic blow -- Some college towns expect losses to measure in the tens of millions of dollars, crippling businesses already struggling through the pandemic. (Washington Post)
* Several fights broke out in Kalamazoo, Michigan, during a rally held by the far-right group Proud Boys, police say.Members of the group were marching in downtown Kalamazoo when they clashed with counter protesters and officers moved to disperse the crowds. (WXMI)
***
Don't blame me for the news. At least I added the bald eagle story.
DESOLATION ROW
They're selling postcards of the hanging, they're painting the passports brown
The beauty parlor is filled with sailors, the circus is in town
Here comes the blind commissioner, they've got him in a trance
One hand is tied to the tight-rope walker, the other is in his pants
And the riot squad they're restless, they need somewhere to go
As Lady and I look out tonight, from Desolation Row
Cinderella, she seems so easy, "It takes one to know one," she smiles
And puts her hands in her back pockets Bette Davis style
And in comes Romeo, he's moaning. "You Belong to Me I Believe"
And someone says, "You're in the wrong place, my friend, you'd better leave"
And the only sound that's left after the ambulances go
Is Cinderella sweeping up on Desolation Row
Now the moon is almost hidden, the stars are beginning to hide
The fortune telling lady has even taken all her things inside
All except for Cain and Abel and the hunchback of Notre Dame
Everybody is making love or else expecting rain
And the Good Samaritan, he's dressing, he's getting ready for the show
He's going to the carnival tonight on Desolation Row
Ophelia, she's 'neath the window for her I feel so afraid
On her twenty-second birthday she already is an old maid
To her, death is quite romantic she wears an iron vest
Her profession's her religion, her sin is her lifelessness
And though her eyes are fixed upon Noah's great rainbow
She spends her time peeking into Desolation Row
Einstein, disguised as Robin Hood with his memories in a trunk
Passed this way an hour ago with his friend, a jealous monk
Now he looked so immaculately frightful as he bummed a cigarette
And he when off sniffing drainpipes and reciting the alphabet
You would not think to look at him, but he was famous long ago
For playing the electric violin on Desolation Row
Dr. Filth, he keeps his world inside of a leather cup
But all his sexless patients, they're trying to blow it up
Now his nurse, some local loser, she's in charge of the cyanide hole
And she also keeps the cards that read, "Have Mercy on His Soul"
They all play on the penny whistles, you can hear them blow
If you lean your head out far enough from Desolation Row
Across the street they've nailed the curtains, they're getting ready for the feast
The Phantom of the Opera in a perfect image of a priest
They are spoon feeding Casanova to get him to feel more assured
Then they'll kill him with self-confidence after poisoning him with words
And the Phantom's shouting to skinny girls, "Get outta here if you don't know"
Casanova is just being punished for going to Desolation Row"
At midnight all the agents and the superhuman crew
Come out and round up everyone that knows more than they do
Then they bring them to the factory where the heart-attack machine
Is strapped across their shoulders and then the kerosene
Is brought down from the castles by insurance men who go
Check to see that nobody is escaping to Desolation Row
Praise be to Nero's Neptune, the Titanic sails at dawn
Everybody's shouting, "Which side are you on?!"
And Ezra Pound and T.S. Eliot fighting in the captain's tower
While calypso singers laugh at them and fishermen hold flowers
Between the windows of the sea where lovely mermaids flow
And nobody has to think too much about Desolation Row
Yes, I received your letter yesterday, about the time the doorknob broke
When you asked me how I was doing, was that some kind of joke
All these people that you mention, yes, I know them, they're quite lame
I had to rearrange their faces and give them all another name
Right now, I can't read too good, don't send me no more letters no
Not unless you mail them from Desolation Row.
-- Bob Dylan
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