The trouble with love is...*

The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
Gets stronger then your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn’t care how fast you fall
And you can’t refuse the call
See you’ve got no say at all


So I have rarely been writing about love lately, but I know most of those who visit here like those kinds of posts the most.

It's been a weird summer, wonderful, chaotic, very family-oriented. But, when all is said and done, we are each left alone with ourselves, and whatever we have learned from our past involvements.

My ex-girlfriend said she always loves anyone she has truly loved -- forever. I believe her, and I'm quite sure that in her way she still loves me. But, I am not at all sure I am like her.

I still love all of my former wives and lovers, yes. But, for me, there is a huge barrier between that kind of love, and the way I (always) feel about my current partner. I'm so myopic, perhaps, that I can focus only on one person at a time. My thoughts, feelings, desires all seem to be monogamous, although my fantasies often do range far afield.

Thus, I wonder whether we are truly wired to be faithful? Part of us seems opportunistic, and our immensely powerful sex drives seem to always be ready to push us toward betrayal of those who genuinely care about us, and depend on us.

This is perhaps the saddest thing about families -- that for all the moms and the dads it can be such a struggle to stay together, emotionally. I feel very, very sad for all six of my children when I contemplate what life has been for them, all kids of divorce.

For my part, all I can say is I never wanted it to turn out that way for them, and counter-intuitively, I didn't stop loving their moms when we broke up. It's just that neither of them knew what to do, nor did I.

And, so it goes for all of us. Tonight, I had dinner courtesy of my lovely friend Julie and her wonderful boyfriend Seth. Julie cooked us vegetarian Indian food, which I love. As I contemplated this young couple, so obviously in love, I felt happy for both of them. Not to mention Seth's 14-year-old dog, so clearly happy with his lot in life.

Love is truly all around. The movie, Love, Actually, remains the most hopeful statement of our time.

Yet, permeating all of this hopefulness, is the wisdom embodied in the lyrics of the lovely ballad republished at the top of this post.

-30-


*Kelly Clarkson - The Trouble With Love Is